A Mix So Simple
by The Creatress
Summary: Severus Snape, the greatest Potions Master known to Hogwarts, can't get get one of the most simplest concoctions right...My first SSHG, everybody!...seriously, this idea came to me over dinner...R&R!


Disclaimer: I wouldn't be here if I owned HP; all my fics would be in the books!

A/N

Omg, my first SSHG!! I'm so excited:D:D:D:D (curls up into a ball, trembling with a loony grin on her face)

Angie: Oh dear…

Dev: Expected…

Creatress: BACK!! ON WITH THE SHOW!!

luv

Creatress

* * *

**A Mix So Simple, the Two Don't Even Deserve a Proper "AND" in the Middle**

Severus Snape glared at the concoction brewing away before him. It was a simple enough so far – boil the main ingredient in salt water. He picked up a thin knife and swirled in around in the mix, occasionally prodding some of the solid bits. Like most potions (and in many ways, so _unlike_ them), the ingredients had to be boiled just right, not overdone or underdone, or it would ruin the whole thing.

Severus frowned as he stabbed a solid part and brought it up to his face. He looked closely at the white stuff. How could one be really sure about this anyway?!

Sighing, he flicked the solid back into the pot – yes, a pot, he wasn't using a cauldron – and tossed the knife back to the kitchen table.

Staring at the pot and its contents, Severus resisted the urge to groan out loud in frustration as he assessed the situation he was in.

In was a late June night. Severus Snape was at his summer house in northern England, and the Potions Master was struggling with apparently one of the most _simplest_ recipes known to man. It was absolutely absurd that someone with his skill and knowledge about potion-making would be having difficulty with this stupid, pot of…

Severus bit down an urge to let out a stream of curse words.

A whole month and four days. Thirty four days. That was how long he had been trying to get this stupid concoction right. Every night, he would set about trying to complete it correctly, and wind up erring in some way or another. It was an embarrassment, really, and Severus shuddered to think what the reaction would be at Hogwarts if the news ever got out.

He supposed it would be okay if it was suddenly introduced into the curriculum… Having been made the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, he wouldn't even need to look toward the dungeons. He would just teach his own courses and hope that an occasion wouldn't arise where he'd have to go down and help. He was actually quite sure that the young, but talented, Potions Mistress, who'd replace him, could handle it on her own.

Oh, she could… It was because of her, in fact, that he was trying to get this right. He knew very well that _she_ could get it right. It had been her who had introduced him to it, in the first place.

What was humiliating was that she knew he couldn't do it… The fact was hard to miss, since she lived with him…

Speaking of which…

Just then, Severus heard the kitchen door open. He only heard it because of his sharp ears. The opener, who was obviously trying not to be noticed, had not heard. And just a second later, he heard his wife tiptoe in. As silent as she was being, her thoughts were loud.

'Don't make noise, be quiet. Be very, very quiet, or he'll snap at you…' the young brunette was thinking.

Severus rolled his eyes. She knew he could read her mind without looking at her – he had discovered that clear memories of her chocolate-brown eyes were enough.

She was trying to quietly pull out a chair to sit on. 'Hush, shhh… Don't scrape, don't scrape… Hush. ... ... ... And don't think anything because he can hear your thoughts.'

Severus whipped around and glared at her.

Hermione Granger-Snape looked dumbstruck for a moment. "Oh," she mumbled, realizing that he'd heard. Wincing under his icy glare, she dropped down into the chair and fixed her eyes onto the white table.

Jerking his head once in a nod of satisfaction, Severus turned back to the pot, leaving his wife's thoughts alone. He picked up a big spoon and swirled it around the pot's contents, deciding that it was time to drain the water. He did so, now very aware of Hermione's eyes on him. He started to carefully add the other ingredients…

"Er… Sev?"

"Hermione, be glad that I haven't kicked you out for coming in here when you weren't supposed to and keep your mouth shut," he stated.

"But, Sev - !"

Severus promptly turned around and gave her one of his best Shut-up-or-Else-Face-Painful-Unholy-Punishment glares that frightened her when she'd been one of his students.

One of his students. Someone who he _taught_ potions to knew how to make something that he didn't.

Cringing, Hermione bit her lip, looking extremely distraught.

Severus turned back to his project, added the rest of the ingredients and stirred it. And he was done.

He scrutinized it. The product was supposed to be a bright yellow – his own looked a little pale. Only a little, though. He took a deep breath. This was it… Test time. He picked up a spoonful.

At the table, Hermione was looking at Severus with concern. She should stop him from consuming any of it; any decent human being would never let another living creature touch that stuff…

So, of course, everybody's favourite muggle-born was completely thrown off guard when the spoonful of the yellow goop was suddenly an inch away from her face.

Hermione looked at Severus in shock. "You… You don't expect me to-?"

"Just have some and tell me how it turned out," Severus said, nonchalantly. He eyed her coolly. "You do, after all, know so much about it."

Hermione groaned. "But, Sev, you-"

"I haven't got all night."

Hermione opened her mouth to protest, but Severus, being the Slytherin that he was, shoved the spoon into her mouth.

Hermione's eyes widened as she coughed and sputtered as the foul taste entered her mouth. She jumped up from the table and ran to the sink to spit out as much as possible.

"Don't overreact," Severus was saying. "Honestly, Hermione, you're behaviour doesn't beat that of a child - "

"You made a mistake," Hermione suddenly snapped from the sink. She turned the tap and splashed some water into her mouth.

Severus raised an eye-brow, a ball of frustration starting to well up in him. "What?" he asked, softly.

Hermione rinsed her mouth of the stuff and gestured toward the counter, where the ingredients were still lined up. "You put too much of _that_ in."

Severus followed her gaze to a bottle of white liquid, which did look a little too empty… No wonder the final product had been pale!

Cursing loudly, he punched the table in frustration and stared at it as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Night 35," he muttered, savagely. Something occurred to him just then and he slowly looked up at his wife, who was still standing near the sink with one hand covering her mouth, her eyes watery, looking quite distressed. In many ways, the woman was still the young girl who he'd taught and terrorized years ago. Even back then, probably even during her first year, she knew how to correctly make the concoction that he'd just screwed up.

Smiling wryly to himself, Severus looked at her. "Come here," he said, softly, offering her an arm.

Hermione walked into his arms without hesitation and wrapped her own arms around his neck while burying her face into the crook of his neck. Severus wrapped his left arm around her waist and stroked her back with his right hand in apology.

"Why?" Severus asked after a moment of silence.

Hermione looked up in confusion and followed his eyes to the pot, which still sat on the stove.

"Why can I not get it right?"

Hermione grinned. "Don't worry, Sev, you almost had it this time around. Thirty five days is nothing compared to how long it took you to say the name right… So, you learned something tonight. Too much milk ruins it."

Severus muttered its name under his breath as though it was a filthy curse word.

"What was that?" Hermione asked. "I thought I heard you say 'and' again…"

Severus narrowed his eyes at the pot and its yellow contents. "Mac' N Cheese," he muttered, viciously.

**- Finis -**

A/N

Creatress: I know! It was completely random, but it came to mind and I just had to write it down… type it out… whichever…

Snape: I could make Mac'n Cheese…

Creatress: Ha!

Mione: You can't even say it right, Sev…

Creatress: Don't worry, Sevvie, I can't make it right either!

Snape: glares at Creatress

Creatress: Readers, I know it's insane, but plz review! I'll give you all Mac N Cheese if you do:D Don't be scared, Mione made it. REVIEW!!


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